An honest, refreshing "emperor has no clothes" question asked by Mom while we were still in the hospital. It is a Catholic hospital and one day while I was there, one of the chaplains came around and asked if we wanted to pray with her.
Sure, we all did, but afterwards the question was asked (after said chaplain left).
Why are we praying for wisdom for the doctors, comfort for the family, comfort for Norm. Why aren't we praying, take this all back? Why wasn't that even an option in the litany listed from the holy person's lips?
I have no axe to grind with the religion anymore, I just thought it brutally honest to hear this question asked by someone who does believe (Mom).
Later at work that week, a very nice couple who come in with this or that church group on a pretty regular basis on Sundays came in. They are always very kind and tip well. We've gotten to know each other on a friendly-professional basis over the last several months. Although they've never asked my "deal" about this or that, they always pray before they eat and whoever is their server gets asked for any prayer needs. The first time this happened, I was quite put off, but just let it happen. Now that I know they aren't going to try to convert me (at least I don't think so), I don't mind. Honestly, when they asked me this time, I said yes, yes I do have a request. I let them pray for Norm while I bowed my head, not really believing any of this particular formula, but knowing that sometimes the unexpected will happen. I really thought at the time he still had some hope.
Hope?
My sister and doctors don't seem to have any at all. Mom is still in shock mode, but is keeping it very together, but has accepted the prognosis. Why can't I hope? Not in God, but in hope.
After the decision to come home the praying customers were back the next week and I told them. I wonder if they ever thought a miracle could happen.
So now we just wait. It's a horrible kind of wait.
Sure, we all did, but afterwards the question was asked (after said chaplain left).
Why are we praying for wisdom for the doctors, comfort for the family, comfort for Norm. Why aren't we praying, take this all back? Why wasn't that even an option in the litany listed from the holy person's lips?
I have no axe to grind with the religion anymore, I just thought it brutally honest to hear this question asked by someone who does believe (Mom).
Later at work that week, a very nice couple who come in with this or that church group on a pretty regular basis on Sundays came in. They are always very kind and tip well. We've gotten to know each other on a friendly-professional basis over the last several months. Although they've never asked my "deal" about this or that, they always pray before they eat and whoever is their server gets asked for any prayer needs. The first time this happened, I was quite put off, but just let it happen. Now that I know they aren't going to try to convert me (at least I don't think so), I don't mind. Honestly, when they asked me this time, I said yes, yes I do have a request. I let them pray for Norm while I bowed my head, not really believing any of this particular formula, but knowing that sometimes the unexpected will happen. I really thought at the time he still had some hope.
Hope?
My sister and doctors don't seem to have any at all. Mom is still in shock mode, but is keeping it very together, but has accepted the prognosis. Why can't I hope? Not in God, but in hope.
After the decision to come home the praying customers were back the next week and I told them. I wonder if they ever thought a miracle could happen.
So now we just wait. It's a horrible kind of wait.
I was there when my 39 year old wife Ellen had heart and kidney failure. I called 911 and watched the medics load her in the ambulance. For the next 4 years I prayed every day for a miracle. My young children prayed. Others prayed too. Went to a Benny Hinn crusade. Sometimes when you are desperate you do desperate things. Ellen died 4 years later. 43 is too young for a wife and mom to die.
ReplyDeleteI hate that God does not 'normally' answer prayers in miraculous ways. Looking back I still wish that God healed Ellen. I wish that he would heal my wife Ann so that she could walk and not be sick all of the time. I pray for a miracle for her almost every day. Not sure why I pray that way. I think that I simply want to see the suffering end.
Regarding Chaplains ... In my pastoral ministry I did a bit of hospital visitation ... I understand why they hedge their prayers. They see so much suffering and so few answers to prayers. I think that it is just difficult for them to believe for miracles. Sometimes it seems that the only folks that seem to pray miracle prayers are the ones who seem to stay away from sick people.
Sorry for the rambling Alice. I do pray that your Mom will see that miracle. I do pray that Norm will get better. And I pray that your family will be comforted through it all.
Blessings, Bob
I'm so sorry Bob, 43 is waaaay to young for a wife and mother to die. What you all must have been through.
DeleteOn one of the cards I read at Norm's bedside yesterday someone had written "God is still in the miracle business." Well....???
I know you have been able to maintain faith through doubt and I wish you and Ann peace. Thank you for your kind words.
I hate those kind of cards Alice. Not sure that I have maintained anything though. Faith has changed so much over the years.
DeleteGentle thoughts & warm hugs sent your way Alice.
ReplyDeletesending healing thoughts, and love your way.
ReplyDeleteSince you asked the question - I'll take a stab at an "answer" ... more like a guess really ... but I think it's a subversive way of minimizing expectations and maximizing the "chance" that there is positive change. Like a coach doesn't tell his little league batter to "swing for the fences" (euphemism for "hit a home run") ... but instead just tells him to "make contact" (bat meet ball) ... in this manner even a foul ball is a "positive" even though for purposes of the actual game it is in reality, a negative (a strike against the batter)
ReplyDeleteOr as George Carlin used to say "God has a divine plan. But what's the point of a divine plan if any schmuck with a $2 prayer book can come along and mess up your divine plan"
I wish you and your family well :)
Sometimes I think things in life are as exactly as they appear. In this case, the further that we get up there in years, the more frequently that we will see the bodies of our aging and elderly friends and loved ones fail them to some degree, and of course, we'll be next.
ReplyDeleteWhen this seemingly inescapable fact is in the forefront, I think people who pray for divine intervention are well-meaning people, albeit, I think they are misguided for a few different reasons.
Either way, it would naturally be a good thing to eliminate, or at least, to minimize suffering, and non-religious people who hope to minimize our suffering is really the religious equivalent of when people pray to eliminate it. The difference is, the latter people are sort of forced to look for good reasons for why the prayer wasn't answered with a "yes". E.g..'My prayer wasn't answered, so there must be a good reason that we suffer, one that I just can't understand', etc. Whereas, the former people must deal head-on with the fact that their hope failed them.
In any event, I see nothing wrong with hope, and I hope that your hope, along with everyone else here who is hoping for you, works to see a positive result.
(((hugs)))
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry your family is going through this. Hope is a beautiful thing. It helps us face the unfaceable. My heart goes out to you.
ReplyDelete